LORDS OF LIGHT!

Despite having only played perhaps six games of Warhammer: Fantasy Battles in my life, I really can't remember a time when the Games Workshop ouevre did not figure heavily into my fantastical accounting. My parents read me Tolkien, Feist, and LeGuin from basically the cradle on--so I never really had much of a chance to be anything other than a fantasy kid.

I think I was seven or so when I saw the ad for Heroquest.My father held out for a few months, but I could tell his heart wasn't in it. Soon, my barbarian was neck deep in orks, skeletons, and fimir, battling through a double-fistful of dungeons. Of course, dad played the Evil Wizard Zargon, and he NEVER went easy on us.

I remember once, my barbarian (Gholar the Impressive) charged ahead of the party and ended up mind controlled. I couldn't seem to roll high enough to break the spell. After dad had me slaughter my brother's elf, he forced me to watch, horrified, as my beloved Gholar chased the rest of the party from the dungeon. I learned a hard, yet important lesson that day. One, Scooby Doo reruns had very much NOT prepared me for.

Never split up the party.

After that came Battle Masters, sort of Warhammer light. Again, Dad mopped the floor with us; but I definitely remember the joy of firing that great cannon and watching the bouncing cannon ball obliterate his beloved Chaos Warriors.

This was roughly the time Games Workshop released these little green pamphlets, one for each army, that gave you a brief rundown of the faction and a sample army list (with points). They were free, so I grabbed an armload from my local hobby store (the dearly departed "Breastplate Hobbies"). I must have spent weeks poring over those little guys, drafting army lists and fighting pretend battles. The pamphlets didn't include actual rules, of course; but that didn't stop me.

My first unit was the old High Elf blue box (five spears, five archers), costing several weeks of allowance and paper route money. I couldn't afford Citadel paints, so I settled for some Testors enamels that I'd gotten for Christmas. 

Bad choice.

Suffice it to say, my poor High Elves turned into goopy messes. I did learn another lesson however--acrylics and inks are worth the price. After that, I was done for. Warhammer Fantasy (Elves), 40K (Eldar and Orks), Necromunda (Redemption, Orlocks), Mordheim (Ostlanders), even a brief foray into Gorkamorka. I didn't actually play the games very often, but I certainly spent quite a bit of time and money collecting (and painting) tiny warriors.

My true love was the lore, though. I wore the bindings of my High Elf and Empire army books, not to mention the dog-eared copies of WIlliam King's 'Slayer novels I managed to unearth in a used book store. Over the years my relationship with Warhammer has waxed and waned (mostly depending on real world pressures), but I've never fallen out of love with it. Even when I couldn't find the time to base and paint a warband, I still managed to carve out a few hours for a game of Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay or (rarely) Dark Heresy.

When Hasbro re-released Heroquest last year, I snatched up one of the initial run. Now, it's my 6-year old and friends who delve deep into dungeons. I, of course, am Zargon--a harsh, but fair villain in the style of my dear departed dad.

Oh dear, I've gone and buried the lead again...

I meant to write a post about my first Black Library novel Children of Teclis, and how honored and excited I am to be holding an ACTUAL BLACK LIBRARY BOOK WITH MY NAME ON IT. But I started talking about Warhammer and the thread sort of got away from me.

So...uh...thank you for wading through my fantastical recollections. Also, if you've got some spare time and a few bucks, why not give Children of Teclis a read? Or failing that, a listen. I'm going to write another post about it when the hardback comes out.

This time, I'll try to stay on topic, I promise: